Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Remember when... a look back at 2008

You know those end of the year wrap-ups that look back on the best of the year or the worst of the year or who died this year or the biggest news stories of the year? It’s cheesy, right? Actually, I’m totally addicted to them, dudes. I looooove those things. Even the obituary listings of those who died in the past year. There’s just something about having everything neatly organized and the chance to look back on an entire year all at once.

So, here’s [drum roll, please] FunnyGals Look Back at The Year That Was 2008. [trumpets sound here, please] I mean, you could just read back through our archives and see what happened to us. Or you could let me do it for you (dudes, I even took notes while doing it!)

2008 saw a bajillion new babies in our group of friends and family. SJ and I each got shiny, new nephews this year (SJ added to her set while mine is a stand-alone for now). And every single one of our friends gave birth (OK, perhaps not every single one, but sometimes it feels like it!)

12 new hairstyles for SJ and at least three different colors for her luxurious locks. Thank goodness she keeps her stylish glasses the same type or I would be in danger of not recognizing her.

One… that’s the number of times I convinced SJ to hug me this year. She has this weird thing where she hugs all the rest of her friends, her family members, the mailman, most of her coworkers and the first person who walks into the room after a Hallmark commercial is on TV… and she still gets weird about hugging me. We’re going to work on that in 2009.

SJ joined Facebook, MySpace, eHarmony, Linkedin, Wikipedia and any other networking site that would have her. Everyone in the world is her friend on one site or another. Oh, except me. Because I belong to exactly zero of those sites. I leave the technical stuff to her.

While SJ’s collections were limited to hairstyles and shoes, KAT collected jobs and houses in 2008. Right now, the collections stand at two houses and five jobs for 2008, but there are still a couple hours left in the year so that could change at any minute.

Injuries were at a minimum this year and it’s possible SJ had the least number of trips to the emergency room since she was 3 (although I suspect she may be keeping ER trip stories from me for fear I will wrap her in bubble wrap and never let her out of my sight). But 2008 kept its hands to itself for the most part with some soccer bruises for KAT, a twisted ankle for SJ and an attack from an angry underwire in SJ’s bra. But, still, a pretty good year.

And we should remember 2008 as the year SJ rocked the Pilates while KAT rocked the… uh… Casbah.

This number isn’t exact, but it is suspected SJ baked 92 dozen cupcakes this year. That is A LOT of cupcakes—no surprise my favorites were the ice cream cone cupcakes for my birthday (although the amount of icing on those Christmas tree ones may have edged out the ice cream cones if I had the chance to try one—my thighs are glad I didn’t)

I won't try to put a number on it, but we made a lot of new blog friends this year and-- even more importantly-- racked up the numbers on our site counter (just kidding). My bookmarks no longer fit on one page and I have stopped doing any work in an effort to keep up with everyone's blogs.

And the last part of our countdown has to be the martinis consumed (although I’m still unsure whether I should count the ones from the night before Thanksgiving that got, uh, “sent back”?) Among the highlights are the Snickers, the Chocolate Mint, the White Chocolate, that purple one, that fruity blue one SJ got, the Little Red Corvette, that other chocolate one and finally, those chocolate ones I made for the PH.

It was good, it was bad, it was sometimes ugly, but I think it’s safe to say SJ and I lived the crap out of 2008. Here’s hoping you can say the same. Happy New Year, everyone!

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A Year in Review Part 1: Movies, Books and Music

It's no secret that I hated 2008. But, it wasn't all horrific. Just mostly.

But I was inspired by another blog I read to come up with a few top picks for the year, and while that forum features things written by professional entertainment writers, I'm going to go with things that entertained SJ, that may not have actually occurred in 2008, but are things that this late-bloomer happened to have caught in 2008.

Without further ado.

Top Movies 2008
3) Mamma Mia - Stop laughing at me. Seriously? I know it was cheese. I know people don't usually burst out into song (actually, I have been known to do this on rare occasions. Or not so rare. I may just do it sporadically throughout the day). The cheese factor made it, for me, the feel good movie of the year.
2) The Dark Knight - It was dark and scary, and much anticipated. I loved it. But not as much as I loved:
1) Iron Man - I'm not usually an action person. But I *Loved* this movie and Robert Downey Jr. in all his hot sarcasticness. I loved it like I love Russell Stover's Dark Chocolate assortment.

Top Albums 2008
How impossible is it for me to choose albums? Completely impossible. I'm not even sure if these came out in 2008, but they are my favorite newish albums that I just started listening to this year.
3) Promised Land by Dar Williams. Not my favorite album by her ("Mortal City" is), but I love her dearly and her fantastic lyrics and light airy voice. So. There.
2) With You by Natalie Walker. I just discovered her this year, and have been happily listening to her albums all year long. The title track on this album makes me happy to listen to.
1) Sorry. This is definitely not 2008. But. Nina Simone: Anthology. Rarely do I sit and listen to an entire album over and over again. This is one that I do.

Top Books read in 2008
These didn't come out in 2008. Sorry. I just read them this year.
3) The Wreckage by Michael Crummey. Sad and beautiful. Hard to find because he's from Newfoundland. But it's worth the Amazon pickup.
2) The Last Night At the Lobster by Stewart O'Nan. I picked up his books this year in an effort to find a local author that I could swap with my friend from Newfoundland. Ergo, I found O'Nan and read this on the train to and fro NYC. It's a quick read and a lovely read.
1) Ever year I read a classic that I missed. This year's choice, and coincidentally, my favorite book of the year: A Prayer for Owen Meany.

So I guess 2008 wasn't terribly bad, as far as entertainment goes. I'm sure there are many (ahem, Pat. Pat's anonymous commenter, KAT, j) that would disagree with me. And I'd love to hear your choices, as well.

What about you? Favorite book/movie/album?

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas with love and a crapload of frosting...

...And to all a good night.

May your Christmas be filled with peace, joy, love, family, friends, fun, hope... and plenty of holiday "spirits!"

Thank you for stopping by our little corner of the Internet this year and keeping us company, reading up on our antics and (justifiably) making fun of us for the aforementioned antics. Have a wonderful holiday, friends!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Should I be worried that the PH turns down a little fun with me for a salami sandwich?

The Pretend Husband's obsession with meat continues... At Thanksgiving, it was turkey. Apparently, at Christmas, it's ham. The PH called me at work today all excited because he had stopped at the grocery store and discovered hams were on sale-- apparently, they normally sell for something like $30 for a nine-pounder (you can do the math...) but were on sale for $1.29 a pound. So he bought four (I should have never gotten the chest freezer running for him-- I've created a meat-loving monster).

But it was the conversation with him after his big purchase that was the best part. The 18-year-old cashier kept asking him questions about his plans for the hams, probably because people rarely buy that many. And the PH started getting uncomfortable, not because of his freaky meat-buying habit, but because he was convinced the girl wanted him. The cashier asked if the hams were for Christmas and then asked what the PH planned to do with them when he replied no. He answered, "Oh, you know, storing it for the families. I just like ham."

On the phone, the PH described for me how she just kept talking to him.

PH: "I think she thought I was flirting with her, but I was being serious. When she kept on asking me questions about hosting dinner, I had to tell her I was married. It was just way too obvious."

Me: "What was too obvious? Her flirting?"

PH: "Oh yeah, all we did was talk about meat the whole time and how much meat I was purchasing... because apparently nobody comes in and purchases three or four hams at a time."

Back off ladies, that meat-loving, socially-awkward man over there is mine, all mine!

Monday, December 22, 2008

i've had about enough, thanks.

Dear 2008,

You suck.

Can you stop soon? You have exactly 9 days to get your act together and ship the heck out before I have a temper tantrum worse than you've ever seen. Worse than, say, Kanye losing an award to Lil John, or some such.

You and your death and sickness and all that crap - and heartbreak and all that -- have just done me in. I'm done with you. What did you offer me this year? Seriously? What *good thing*? A promotion, which was okay and all (okay - that was actually pretty awesome of you) but then you riddle me with so much stress and crap that really, was it worth it? (maybe? i'm not completely sold.) Okay, granted, I did make some new friends, who are *fabulous*. And we did blog a hell of a lot more than we had previously. But on the whole, you were mean to me, 2008. And we are not parting as friends.

So how about you go the way of the other worst years ever and get out of my sight. In fact, you should go make out with 2005. I hope you two are really happy together.


Friday, December 19, 2008

I would never actually say this to his face, but the PH was right (for once)

Among the projects I've taken on at both our "practice house" and the current one is wiring and hanging the light fixtures. Not to brag or anything, but I actually put up the chandelier at our first house (although, if I'm being perfectly honest, it didn't work quite right until Dad came for a visit).

So putting up the light in the front hall didn't seem like such a big deal. It was a pain that I couldn't get to it until about 7:30 at night, which meant I had to clutch a flashlight under my chin while I wired it, but I persevered. For two hours... after which, it still didn't work.

The complication was because the light in question is controlled by three light switches and I wasn't the one who took the previous fixture down so it wasn't a matter of wiring it the same way. So, despite my best guess at which of the 26 wires went where (OK, perhaps it was only six wires, but still...), the switch at the top of the stairs was, at one point, controlling the lights outside the house. And the dimmer in the hall? Was dimming the lights outside the front door. Yeah, I'm not sure how that happened either.

After a lot of frustration, we decided to abandon the project and try again the next night. At which time we began trying different combinations of wires, hoping to stumble on the right one. It wasn't completely random-- I tried finding a diagram on the Internet to follow, but couldn't find our exact situation (look at us! putting our lives in the hands of the Internet-- what trust!) While I tried to reason out the situation (well, those wires were twisted together and they look like they might be these wires in this diagram...), the PH just started twisting different wires together. And, on his second try, the light worked (and, even more importantly, the switches controlling it did not affect our outside lights).

So, for the rest of the night, I had to listen to the PH talk about what a genius he is and how he found the solution in two tries after I had spent hours trying to make the light work. Would it be terrible if I hope he gets a little shock the next time he tries to show off his electrical skills?

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Amish Friendship Struggles.

Note: We were super bloggers yesterday and posted not once, but TWICE. check it, dudes. So you know. In case you missed our discussion re: bad Christmas carols and changing sheets, scroll down, please, and let us know your thoughts.

i have one of those breads at home. you know the kind. the kind that lives in a plastic bag in dough form and smells like wine, but is, in fact, yeasty dough? it's like chain-pastry. you get one, you add stuff randomly over 10 days, and then you give it to four of your frenemies?

that one.

and technically i was supposed to bake it yesterday. but i didn't have the bags required to break it down. so i'm going to bake it on day 11. do you think that's okay?

i bet it is. and although i know how yummy this bread is, i'm not at all tempted to keep another starter for myself, because i know this means you get suckered into baking bread every 10 days.

damned tricky amish.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Who knew the Bangles and Eastland Knots were so popular?

Google Analytics has been providing me with non-stop entertainment, so I thought I'd share with you some of the gems I've learned about our visitors.

They love the 80s, they love large-figured women, and they know the words to Linda Ronstadt songs.

You folks are scaring me a little, honestly. Not all of you. But those of you who are looking for "Busty just 18" may be disappointed. We're way over 18. And Busty is actually just a nickname, not a physical description. (I blame KAT for the overwhelming amount of "Busty" searches that bring people to our blog.)

So, because I find these funny, here are some of the keywords that are bringing you here. Please, sit down. Kick off your loafers. Stay a while.

1) Eastland knot. True, once upon a time KAT waxed poetically about the resurgence of the 80s in fashion trends. And for some reason, this is our number one search term. I suspect there is a marketing director at Eastland that's trying to contact KAT about being their next model.

2) "Busty Aunt" This is KAT's nickname for herself. I'll let her explain.

3) "not in the market for a boy who loves only me" -- the lyrics to a Linda Ronstadt song. I tried in vain to get our few readers back in 2006 to engage in a little song lyrics quiz. It went awry.

4) "The Bangles." Seriously? You're looking for Pat over at Blog Like an Egyptian. You and your Eastlands can go walk right over there. Tell him sj says hi!

5) "burp tastes like food five hours later" - I .. what? Really? I can't... I don't...

I've got nothing.

But maybe try some Dentyne.

Come share too much information about your personal hygiene!

It's group participation time again, kids. This time, I'm doing a little poll and the question is, how often do you change your sheets? C'mon, don't be shy! Once a week? Once a month? Once a year? The question came up last night while the Pretend Husband and I were changing the sheets on our bed. I will only reveal how long the sheets had been on our bed if we get at least six responses to this poll (don't get too excited, we've only been living in the house for a few months so it's not like I last changed them in February or something!)

On a completely unrelated note... Last night, while the PH and I were in the car, that song called "Christmas Shoes" came on. It's all about a poor boy who wants to buy some shoes for his mom for Christmas so she'll look pretty "if she meets Jesus tonight." Yup, the kid's mom is dying and he wants to get her one last Christmas gift that will make her smile... and I started laughing and couldn't stop. In my defense, it's because of how cheesy the song is and I have something about songs about mundane things (musicals totally crack me up because instead of saying something in three words, people sing about them in at least 30). Yes, I'm a terrible person (but at least I change my sheets regularly!)

Friday, December 12, 2008

Maybe when I'm 40 he'll believe I've finally grown up...

I’m feeding two beagles while my dad and his fiancée are out of town (note to burglars: their house is not empty; it is filled with gun-toting men and Pit Bulls). Because my dad is my dad, he wrote out pages of instructions for me (note to Dad: I’m 32! I can handle this!)

 The instructions included notes on how to use the alarm system, how to use the garage door opener, what to do if the alarm goes off and which lights and doors to use while I’m there. (Strangely, it included no instructions on what food and vitamins to give the dogs… I had to just remember that stuff.)

On top of the novel filled with instructions, my dad walked me through the house to point out the alarm keypads, to talk about the times he’s accidentally set it off and to imitate it for me at the top of his lungs (“INTRUDER! INTRUDER! LEAVE IMMEDIATELY!”) Oh, and he gave me the invaluable advice that if I ever pull up to the house and the alarm is going off, I should not go into the house (Uh, thanks Dad. Because I was going to pull my shotgun out from under the seat of my car and go teach those burglars a lesson?) After about an hour, I got a little antsy with the process agreeing to feed the dogs had turned into, so I started getting a little smartass.

Me: Dad, I might use your Jacuzzi while you’re gone.

Dad: Definitely. You and [the Pretend Husband] should come over and watch TV, eat whatever you want and you can even stay over if you want (note: he lives 5 miles from our house, but whatever…)

Me: Can we have friends over?

Dad: Well… you can have one friend come over.

Me: One? What if we want to have SJ and J over?

Dad’s Fiancée (catching on to what I’m doing): Yeah, what if it’s a married couple? Can they have a another couple over?

Dad: OK. You can have one couple come with you.

Me: But what if I want to have a few friends over?

Dad: No. Just two friends.

Me: Please? C’mon, Dad. If your parents go out of town, you’re supposed to have a party.

Dad: No. No parties.

(Yup, 32 years old and I own my own house... and I still have to be warned not to go after burglars and forbidden to have parties while my parents are out of town!)

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Man alive! Tagged *again*... I love being popular.

First off, please continue with our wonderful story featuring my parents, Joey Tribiani, Jen Aniston and Brangelina. I'm curious to see how this turns out.

The always awesome Sam tagged me yesterday in her myriad of posts, and because yesterday we stole Southern Belle's game, I thought I'd try Sam's meme before we continue the story that the Belle tagged us with.

The rules:

1. Link to the person where you received it
2. Share 7 random/weird facts about yourself
3. Tag 7 Random people at the end of your post and include links
4. Let 'em know they were tagged.

Now, these are always fun, and although I'm pretty sure you know every odd and random fact about me - like my M & M issues or all about my deeply held beliefs.

And I did just do something similar for my dirty mistress Facebook (and I confess that I may be repeating some of those). But I bet there's enough weird about me that I can come up with 7 more. Why not?

1) I have double jointed fingers.
2) I also am left-handed and have atrociously bad hand-writing, but it's worse when my hands are cold. I cannot write if my hands are cold. They cramp up.
3) My first pet was a sheep named Grey Grey. I was 3.
4) I always book my airplane seats near or on the wings. I'm convinced that will save my life some day.
5) I have no feeling on my bottom lip or chin on the right side, which gives me a crooked smile.
6) I cry at anything, including and not limited to bill boards, commercials, movies, books, songs and random thoughts.
7) I split my head open on the same rocking chair three times when growing up. You'd think my parents would have gotten rid of it. But no. It's still there.

And now!
My tags!

1) KAT, of course. I can't steal all the random fun.
2) Andy, although he did just spill 100 things about himself. This may be tricky.
3) Stephanie, because she strikes me as someone with fun peccadilloes.
4) Scargosun, whose blog I just started reading not too long ago, but she's such fun!
5) SRG, because I know firsthand how wacky she is.
6) Bryan, because he hasn't posted in a while, and this can be bullet-pointed.
7) Muffy, because she's damned funny and sassy and I dig her blog.

Okay, kids. Have fun!

current itunes song: "joy to the world" by the celtic ladies

Monday, December 08, 2008

Grab the kids, it's group participation time! (Our fun holiday game)

So I came up with an idea for a fabulous game and I have to say that I thought of it all myself, with no help from anyone. Especially not Southernbelle. What? You don't believe me because I'm making such a big deal about this being my idea? Fine, then. It wasn't.

Southernbelle hosted a really fun game on her blog that is still ongoing. It involves a person posting their wish in the comments (such as "I wish I could turn invisible at will") and other people totally killing that wish (such as "You can turn invisible at will, but the technology is still new so you are never completely in focus when visible") and then posting their own wish. You should definitely go to Southernbelle's blog and play!

But not before you play the other fabulous game she came up with and asked us to host. Here's how it goes. I'm going to post the first half of a sentence and  you're going to complete it in the comments and then post the first half of the next sentence. So, if I write "I hate it when..." you would write something witty like " mom makes me pay rent for living in her basement. But I love it when..." and then the next person would finish that sentence and write the first half of the next sentence. Got it? Because I don't know how I could make it any more clear (especially since Southernbelle summed it up in a sentence when she explained it and I just provided a paragraph's worth-- it must be the journalist in me). And if we come up with a good plot line, I will be claiming it as my own work and publishing it under my byline (you have been warned...)

So, the first sentence fragment is...
"The most annoying thing about the holiday season is..."

More letters from sj

You'd think I'd have a great recap from the weekend, where we celebrated KAT's birthday, played just 3 games of setback, I wrote out 14,301 Christmas cards, got crafty and finished nearly all of my shopping. But alas, I don't.

Instead, I have more letters. And I do still hate low-rise tights (maybe my legs are longer than normal people?)....

Dear Mother Nature,

It was 10 degrees when I left my house today. And I hear tomorrow it will be 50. I think I speak for all of us in southern New England when I say "WTF?"

However, I am a big fan of Saturday evening snowfalls. So thanks for that nice 2 inch dusting that covered everything, and yet, didn't require us to do any shoveling. I'd like the same thing for late Christmas Eve, please. Maybe snow can start around 10? See what you can do.

In the meantime, your crazy mood swings with the weather continue to seriously @#% up my hair. You're a woman. Surely you understand this issue?

But again, on the other hand, I do have a great excuse for new boots.

You are indeed a fickle bitch, Mother Nature. But today, I consider us wary friends.

Yours in wool,

Dear Star 99.9,

You and your 24 hours of Christmas carols are just great.

But maybe a little less Manheim Steamroller? I mean. I don't even... it's like... it's like I'm in the department store elevator. At Christmastime. And frankly, that's not an image that anyone wants to conjure up.


Dear Cabela's,

I just wanted to thank you for the great tour we got of your store the other day while Christmas shopping. Really. We went in there for one thing, but managed to see every single department because not one person could tell us where the one thing we wanted was.

You sent us to: Camping, Archery, Auto/AV, Boating and Home/Cabin. Seriously?

I didn't need the tour. Trust me. I've been there. I've seen every department.

But I fail to see how one item could be in either Boating or possibly... Archery?


Friday, December 05, 2008

Well, in his defense, the turkeys WERE a selling at a big discount...

In case I didn't have enough evidence that I married my father (see also: speaking to me like I'm 10 and grounding me until I'm 40), the Pretend Husband proved it all over again at Thanksgiving.

The word spread quickly through our family that turkeys were being sold at some grocery store for only 49 cents a pound. I don't cook, but I'm told that about half of what all the other stores were selling it for and therefore, A BIG DEAL. Such a big deal that the PH was ordered to stop at the store every night on his way home from work, my brother was sent over multiple times (because he lives closest to the store) and even my sister was required to make a trip there when she flew in for the week. Because, you see, there was a one-bird limit per customer.

My dad found his way around that one by buying a turkey, putting it in his car, then going back into the store and paying for a second turkey at a different register. The PH, on the other hand, took the deception to new heights.

The PH bought his first turkey of the night then headed out to the parking lot to put it in his car. As he was walking to his car, he thought the kid that collects the shopping carts in the parking lot was eyeing him suspiciously, so the PH put the turkey in the trunk, MOVED HIS CAR TO A DIFFERENT SPACE and then, to disguise himself further, put on the coat and tie he had left in the car the first time.

Because, apparently, a coat and tie changes a man's appearance entirely? As does walking into the store from a different direction? I'm surprised the PH didn't try to buy a wig or grow a mustache or change his outfit entirely in the car. But I guess the laugh is on me because my dad is now the proud owner of five turkeys while we can boast about the four in our freezer.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

When real life and blog life collide...

Well, not really *collide*.

But kind of. Okay not at all.

Let me just try to explain. One of the blogs I follow, as you can see, from our happy reads there on the right... See them? Okay, back to me. Focus, people! ... is called Blog Like an Egyptian. I have no idea where he got that name. I assume he really likes the Bangles. And why not, really. But the funny dude that writes it is an editor at daily newspaper nearish to where I work. I've never met him. At all. But I read his blog. And I believe we have one mutual acquaintance. But that's it. He probably thinks I'm a crazy person.

But that would just indicate that he may actually know me.

And why do I mention it? For no real reason other than the fact that it's like I know him, but I don't, and neither do my friends. But I reference his blog in conversation with other people that I do know in real life as if they must have read it too and they must know what I'm talking about. I do this with other blogs too, but notably his, because he's in CT.

Evidence A: He recently blogged about Britney and Joan Jett. So I started a conversation with someone I work with right after reading his blog that was somewhere along the lines of, "So yeah, I'd spend $125 to watch that insanity unfold."

Blank stares ensue. Then I spend 10 minutes trying to cover like I didn't just have a conversation with someone in my head before speaking out loud.

Evidence B:
j: Have you heard from any of your friends today?
me: Yeah! Andy had this brilliant idea to come up with definitions for word verification... and sb is so my twin. Have you ever heard Aussie slang?
j: huh?

I confess the lines between our bloggy world and our real world can get fuzzy. And throw Twitter and FB and forget it. I have an electronic identity crisis.

I figure I'm not alone. Right?

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Happy Birthday, BFF!

Today is a holiday. Did you not know it?

Well. Let me do my part by spreading the word.

Today is the third anniversary of the 29th birthday of our beloved KAT. Yay!

And, as we like to do here on Funnygals, no birthday is complete with out a blog tribute. And since we've been doing this for so long, you'd think it'd be hard to come up with special little memories that we've shared together.

In fact, it is not at all hard. Because we try, even with our busy crazy lives, to spend at least 6 martinis together each month. (That's a little shout out to our dearest Molly who has been too busy to blog, but we still love her oodles. I think being a phone sex operator may be a little wearying. Poor lamb.)

So, without further ado, here is my blog tribute to the lovely and talented KAT. These are my plans for her at 32.

1. We've discussed it, but we haven't done it yet. And I think no time like the present for us to dress up in our wedding finery and head over to Dairy Queen. What's that? DQ is closed? You know, that'd usually be the case, but KAT and I know every one in the state and there is one not far from us that actually stays open year round. Stay tuned for pics.

2. Girls weekend. We haven't had a good one in a *long* time, mostly because of her penchant for working nine jobs. But, this year, we WILL make time to ditch the boys and head off on our own to some lovely beachy retreat to drink martinis, eat chocolate bon bons and enjoy the sunset from our ocean view balcony room that must exist somewhere between Old Saybrook and Cape Cod, hopefully conveniently close to our favorite lobster place.

3. I think she should have a baby. No pressure. But. Just saying. If not, she should at least practice conceiving.

4. Did we ever share the hamburger story? Add to it the Kit Kat story. If we haven't, well. I leave that to KAT's discretion.

5. This is rapidly deteriorating into a things I love about KAT, so what the heck. Let's just go with that.

6. I love that I can call her at 8:15 on her birthday to wish her a happy birthday, and she's been up for two hours. I also love that I can call her at 10 a.m. some days and it's like she just got up. She's all quirky like that.

7. I love that we can order complimentary martinis. We know enough never to order the same ones at the same time. Duh. How else can you get through the martini menu and still remember which ones you liked?

8. I love that she remembers every birthday of every person she ever met. Maybe not, but it seems that way.

9. I love that we can go - at most - two weeks without actually speaking, but be fully informed of what's going on thanks to the blog.

10. We totally talk about you all in real life like we know you all. You are frequently in our conversations when we get together for dinner.

There are, at least, 90 more things I could come up with. But I'm still a little exhausted after a bug, so my brain isn't working that fast. Besides, I have to save the next 10 for 33. And then 34... you get the idea.

So please take a minute, if you will, to wish my dearest KAT a happy birthday, and please share with us what things you love about her. I promise I won't reuse them in the birthday card that I'm making for her. Honest.

Hugs and Kisses,

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

How much is that doggy... in the cardboard box... out by the road... at 5 o'clock in the morning?

ETA: SJ and I both skipped yesterday then posted at around the same time (apparently, she's a faster typer than I am because she got her-- *cough*photo-heavy*cough*-- post up first). But make sure you scroll down for part deux of Two For One Tuesday.

Man, that bee-yotch karma must be PMSing something bad because she did not stop at the "Look at me, only sick three times from drinking" fiasco. Oh no! She came back at us full force this week (but not with puking from drinking-- I try to limit myself to only a couple of shots on Monday nights).

Oh no, karma took a whole new tact that began with friends telling us about their year-old dog and how terrible she is. She eats poop, she catches and tries to eat animals like chipmunks and toads, she has peed in their dining room so often the floor is warped. And I was like, "Ohhh, that's too bad" to their faces but all like, "Sucks to be you bitches! Casey is a year-old too and she's just perfect! Perfect! P-E-R-F-E-C-T! Perrrrrfect!" (Why yes, I do sound a little like a cheerleader in my head, why do you ask?)

Casey, who is a generally a laid back dog (except for when she tries to bite Molly's face off, but details, schmetails...) decided a couple of nights ago to be a pain in the ass. It was a short-lived run for her, with some barking and whining after we went to bed and left the dogs downstairs. Well, the next night, karma must have been egging her on because she spent more than an hour barking, whining and clawing at the door when we first went to bed. Yelling at her didn't help, swatting her butt didn't help and even threatening to never let her have her friends over for sleep overs didn't help (I know, shocking, right?)

She finally settled down and we all fell asleep... until 5 o'clock in the morning, when she resumed her reign of terror on the house. We lay awake listening to her for over an hour before I went downstairs and tried to up the level of my threats ("that's it, no rawhide for two weeks... and I will be putting the trash can out of your reach, young lady... and don't even think about asking for a belly rub!") I may have also prayed for Molly to bitch-slap her into submission because I'm sure our little angel Molly (relatively speaking) wasn't happy with being awake that early either.

The long and the short of it is, we were pretty much up for the day at 5 a.m. And you'd think this would have been a good lesson in having some compassion for others and not tempting fate, but actually all it's taught me is how to put up an ad on Craig's List to sell a dog (OK, not really, but Casey may not be so lucky if she does it again tonight... Mama needs her beauty rest).

I don't have a Flickr account, but I can still meme...

So the lovely Gucci Momma Stephanie tagged us with this meme. And I bet she thought we'd never do it.

Well. We would. It just took us some time. And honestly, KAT and discussed who was going to blog which days (we're NEVER that organized. but apparently when we've been drinking, we're all over the blog-planning), but I think in my martini haze, I just can't remember what days are mine.

But I know tomorrow is mine. And since KAT didn't post, it looks like today is mine too. Woot!

The rules of the meme were something to the effect of go to the 6th photo on the 6th page of your Flicker account and post the pic. And then go to the 6th page of pics on your computer and post.

So I did the next best thing. I chose the 6th album and 6th picture in iPhoto.


So this was at my in laws house on Thanksgiving...

I'm *kidding.* Just because she yelled at me for not having children (true) it doesn't make my mother in law a bad person. ("I want to be able to enjoy them!")

And this?
Well this is just simply my 10 pound blue fish from last fall (you can tell because of the hair color. kind of like how you can tell the age of a tree by its rings).

And now I think we're supposed to tag some people to pass it on. But I don't remember the rules about that.

But I'm going to go ahead and tag people anyway.

How about:
the always funny and sweet Sam
le southernbelle (aka sj's twin)
the adorable hp

does that suffice for tagging? i hope so.