Friday, June 27, 2008

Kat's Lil Sis swears she doesn't know what she did to scare them off

When Kat's Lil Sis got home from work the other night, Lil Brother-In-Law was standing out in the driveway shaking his head. Remember the neighbors that moved to a different house in the same neighborhood to avoid living next door to the Lil Sis house? Well, time for Round Two.

While Lil Bil was working on the lawn, he saw the husband pull up and begin to turn into the driveway of his former home (which apparently he still owns, which means Lil Sis and Bil are so bad to live near, these people are willing to pay two mortgages to get away from them!) I guess the weirdos still get their mail at their old house. Well, when the guy saw Lil Bil standing there, he quickly abandoned the turn and took off!

Ideas to mess with these people now range from Lil Sis and Bil sitting out on their front lawn every evening in an effort to keep them from getting their mail unless they sneak up in the middle of the night to Lil Bil befriending someone who works in the same department as the guy (because yes, they work for the same company!) and spending all his time hanging around that department and freaking the former neighbor out.

Of course, I think Lil Sis and Lil Bil should spend less time figuring out how to further bug these people and more time thinking about what they did to scare them away. I can say from experience that Lil Sis is no day in the park to share living space with, but who knew Lil Bil was such a pain to put up with too?!?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

not ready for kids entry #251

so i didn't blog about this last week, but i should have.

e, my sister's son, has learned to fish. he's a prodigy of sorts, because he's just 3. except that while he loves to cast - and is fantastic at it -- he doesn't really realize that he has sharp hooks at the end of the pole.

so friday night, i was visiting my parents with j because, after spending 3 days away from me and bailey, the first thing he wanted to do on friday night was... to go visit my parents. (sadly, so true.)

and soon the sister formerly known as anonymous brought e and there was a party. a *fishing* party. my dad has a pond in his backyard, stocked with lots of little fish, and we spent the better part of a half-hour scouring the yard for worms to use as bait.

i do find it somewhat funny when the first time e caught a fish he launched it out of the water so fast that the poor fish (and nearly - me) didn't know what hit it.

funnier still when j said to e "give me the fish" and as e swung the pole over to him (and everyone within a 20 feet radius ducked), my 5'10 very well-built, very masculine husband turned to me and handed me the pole "here, auntie sj. you can take this off..."

right. but we did all take turns with the little kiddie pole trying to land the little fishies (which, is not at all like shooting fish in a barrel. it actually was harder than you'd think, considering the fish couldn't really escape us).

and that's how i spent my friday night. the end.

Monday, June 23, 2008

I will never understand men... especially the one I'm married to!

So my last post was about the Pretend Husband's bad day, which included getting rear ended at a stoplight. Here's the update: the next morning, the PH was going out the door when he stopped and said, "I'm wearing the same pants from yesterday. I'm going to try to reverse my bad luck."

He went on to say something about a "lucky suit" that he wears when he needs his day to go smoothly, but I was laughing too hard at his concept of re-wearing pants to reverse his luck to listen.

(Then he got proven right because after seven months of fighting with an insurance company trying to get them to finally cancel our insurance policy with them, we got a big rebate check. When I told the PH, he said he's going to continue to wear that pair of pants until we win the lottery.)

Saturday, June 21, 2008

dear blogspot...

Dear Blogger,

I'm writing you to apologize for my recent dalliances into the world of Facebook. I'm really sorry - it's not you, it's me. I love you and all you have to offer. I mean really, you're great for the wonderful outlet you provide so I can update the world with my mundane life. Sometimes, you even let me post electronic birthday messages to my friends and family.

But lately, I've found something has been missing -- mainly, the ability to find people that I know and read about *their* lives. I love what you've been able to do for me -- but I felt like I needed more.

And now I know better. Sure FB may offer the ability to cyberstalk my high school boyfriend who still hasn't confirmed my friend request (but then, this was the same boy that didn't talk to me after I beat him on the PSAT's), and maybe I've been able to play online games of Scrabble with friends who are in far off cities like "New Haven" and such.

But really, how can it compare to what you can provide to me. Oh how I've missed the hilarious tales of Kathy, Molly, and so many others. So while Facebook may be a dirty mistress whom I meet late at night in a back alley, know that you're really the one I love.

-sj

Thursday, June 19, 2008

And then karma stepped in and taught me a lesson

In the middle of the workday, I got a voicemail from the Pretend Husband going on and on (and on) about what a bad day he was having. Everything was going wrong, he had driven somewhere, then somewhere else, then had to go all the way back to the first place for some reason. Then his office called and something else had gone wrong. Blah, blah, blah.

So when he called a little while later and started talking (again!) about what a bad day he was having, I interrupted him and said, "You already told me in your message."

He responded, "Yeah, but since then someone rear ended our car."

Oh.

(Not to worry. There was no damage and no one was hurt. But still, it taught me a little lesson about not being so quick to tune out the PH).

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

And so it begins...

We took the Pretend In-laws out for a belated Father's Day dinner. In the car on the way home, we had this conversation with them:

Pretend Father-in-Law: So we decided while we were on vacation that you guys need to have a kid.

Me: What?

PFIL: Yeah, it opens up a whole new world of shopping. (Then he and the Pretend Mother-in-Law began describing all the toys and kid furniture and other items they would have bought if they had grandkids to give them to).

Me: Well, you could buy that stuff now and hold onto it.

PFIL: Oh no, I have to see the kid first. It has to be tangible.

To be fair, they DID manage to hold off from the baby pressure for the first seven months of our marriage, even though I think it may have been tougher than they let on. And sorry to disappoint, but we have a little something called a move and renovating a new house to consider before we'll even consider the request.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

happy birthday, mom!

no, you're not experiencing deja voux. it just happens to be that my parents' birthdays are in fact 9 days apart.

so now that i've had a chance to salute my dad, indulge me for a minute to pay tribute to my dear mom too.

i'd post a picture of my mom, if i had one handy, but i think it's fair to say that you could just take the picture of me and add a couple of years. for the past five years or so, i've constantly been told how much i look like my mom -- and there's nothing wrong with that. i can only hope to have as much grace and as few grey hairs as my mom has managed in the past um... 30 years longer than me.

as the mother of three girls, she's had a heck of a job to do -- molding us into three very unique women. every one of us is different, but we all hold a little piece of our mom close to our hearts. for my oldest sister (known around here as anonymous), it's her unwaivering sense of purpose. my mother is always busy, always trying to start something new and help someone who needs help. my sister is just the same - always reaching out to those around her to help them with whatever they need. she's always busy, but never too busy to help someone.

for my middle sister (tmg), it's my mom's mommyness. it's that quality of knowing when someone needs a little tlc -- an instinctual feeling that she needs to reach out and make sure that the clouds clear, the wounds are healed and no tears need be spilled. some people may think that they are perhaps overcautious -- but their concern comes from the same place - the place that makes them both such great mommies.

as for me, well, besides my good looks, i have gotten my mom's creative streak. we all have, to a degree, but i've tried to continue my mom's quilting and crafting tradition. (you'd think that means that i made her a present. alas, i didn't. um. unless you count this blog entry. which i guess you can't. at least, you shouldn't, if you're my mom and you're reading this.)

so thanks, mom, for all that you've done for us over the years, but mostly, for making us the women we are today.


Sunday, June 15, 2008

dude. shut it!

so last night was another fun night in the world of SJ and KAT - and our respective spouses. we went to dinner at a nice, but LOUD newish restaurant that clearly isn't getting by on its high marks for prompt service.

but regardless of the fact that it took an inordinately long time to be served, we still managed to have a few laughs (and a few drinks) and not get banned from the premises -- all good indications of a good night!

from the interesting defensive position of our our waitress when i asked her about the tomato and mozzarella salad (after i ordered it, it occurred to me that what with the nationwide recall, perhaps i should skip them -- her response was "oh - it's okay. our tomatoes are all fda-approved." really? so those tomatoes from the grocery store are... from the black market?) to the hilarious conversation that followed and had something to do with our intense and perhaps disproportionate dislike of a local faux celebrity who may have recently engaged ("she's a slut!") -- all in all it was a good night.

but it also left its mark on me and j. we usually refer to ourselves by the couple-friendly (even when fighting) moniker "hon". except, after spending an evening with KAT and the PH, we've suddenly adapted to using their language for each other- namely, we've started addressing each other as "dude."

all day long today, through some particularly heated philosophical debates re: social anthropology and whether it was appropriate to describe some actions as a scientific approach (seriously- this debate lasted from the middle of farmington all the way to Target in New Britain and it involved some yelling - mostly by j at me) -- instead of angrily addressing each other as "hon" we instead used the KAT/PH lingo: "DUDE! shut it" his response: "dude- no- *you* shut it."

i think it's good no one overheard this little exchange. they'd probably think we were a little nuts. so you know. i thought i'd post about it on the blog.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Just like college... except with a lot less beer

I stumbled in the house around 2 this morning, kicked off my shoes and flopped onto the sofa to watch TV. Yup, 2 a.m. And I finally tumbled into bed at 3:30 a.m. after my wild night. You know, my wild Wednesday night.

But, before you get all worried that I'm reverting back to my crazy college days, I should point out that I was actually working until 3:30 a.m., covering the Legislature's special session. Yeah, not so jealous of me anymore, are you?

It was a long night and this 30-something-year-old body is just not built for those anymore. Especially after getting woken about five hours after falling asleep.

I had mentioned to the Pretend Husband the night before that I was possibly going to get up and go cover an event at 11 a.m. this morning, but it was dependent on how late the session went. My boss said it was fine for me to skip the event if I was up all night.

But, for some odd reason, the PH interpreted that to mean, "Could you please set the alarm for 9 a.m. before you leave? Thanks." All day (in between yawns), I've been repeating to myself "He meant well, he meant well" in an effort to refrain from killing him when he gets home from work.

That's if I can stay awake long enough to do it.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

How bad a daughter-in-law am I? Start the voting.

OK, the question of the day... if you were throwing your sister a baby shower, would you invite your own mother-in-law? So, she’s no relation to your sister and is related to you by marriage. What do you say?

Don’t worry, there’s no bet riding on this or anything. It stems from the Pretend Mother-in-Law asking if she’s going to be invited to Lil Sis’ shower. I had been on the fence about it, but said yes when she asked. The Pretend Husband (who usually doesn’t give a crap about this stuff because... well, because he’s a guy) seemed horrified that I had considered not inviting her.

Of course, this is the dude who couldn’t wait to register for our wedding and is already pressuring me to have a baby shower (and no, I’m not even close to being pregnant!). Oh, and when he thinks the oil might be low in the car, he asks me to check it. He also stood by and watched me change out a couple of light fixtures in the house. So, yeah, I’m beginning to suspect he’s the woman in our relationship.

In any case, the PMIL is invited either way, but I still want to know what you think. Vote away.

Monday, June 09, 2008

happy birthday, dad!

yesterday was my dad's 60th birthday. and while we like to salute each other with birthday tributes, i thought i'd make a little tribute to dear ol' dad, and beat everyone else to the punch who will be doing similar things next week when we celebrate father's day.



i owe so much to my dad. my sense of humor, my ability to judge people, my hard-working nature and not to mention my fantastic fishing ability (he started me at such a young age).



my dad taught me so many lessons in life. mainly, how to do everything myself. like. everything. i can make my own clothes (which is really courtesy of my mom), or put up drywall. and use a plumb bob to make sure i have a straight line down to the floor.

it's true, i haven't always gotten along perfectly with my dad. i think partly because i may have inherited a stubborn streak. and it may have felt like some times, my dad may have been pulling me in one direction...


really i know he's always let me lead my own path.

everything i am today, i owe to my parents. i may not always show it, and he may not always know it, but i love my dad for all that he's done for us, and for teaching me even when i didn't want to learn.

to quote a favorite song (by Holly Dunn) that's always reminded me of my dad...

"Daddy's hands were soft and kind when I was cryin´.
Daddy´s hands, were hard as steel when I´d done wrong.
Daddy´s hands, weren´t always gentle
But I´ve come to understand.
There was always love in Daddy´s hands."

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

ah, family.

well, i'm sure you're all curious about a few things (and by all, i mean you, our loyal lurkers who read and don't post comments and work at large insurance companies named for a state capitol... that's right, sunshine. i know all about you...) so let me just start by saying:

holy crap. driving with a canoe on top of your car is LOUD.

we managed to get everything done that would have enabled us to leave remotely on time on Saturday for the five hour drive (four and a half if you're my speed race BIL and 6 and a half if you're my parents who stop at tag sales.. unless they're on their way home, in which case, don't drink any coffee because they stop for NOTHING).

we arrived on the islands of Lake Champlain around 2, and at the cottage (read: beautiful lakehouse on a private road because that's just how we roll) just before 3. we started fishing at 3:01.

well not really, but that's a pretty good indication of how itching my dad was for us to get on the boat and catch the first big fish.

which i did! the first day i caught a 6.5 pound northern pike. i know! right! big toothy creature!

but overall the fishing was less important for stories than just the general idea of spending a week with parents, anonymous and family. there was a song involved: "auntie sj's here today... auntie sj's here today...." and for some reason, my nephew hasn't exactly nailed the proper gender prefix for my husband. so all week long, j was known as "auntie j". it was "auntie sj and auntie j!"

j tried to um... get back at my THREE YEAR OLD nephew by calling him his niece. ("honey, i don't think he realizes what he's saying...."

silly boys.

but really the highlight of the entire week (not the night in montreal, although that was lovely) was the time spent on the boat on friday night with my sister, my husband and my dad. i laughed so hard i nearly peed a few times. i mean. i laughed so many times so hard that i felt like i had to.. oh you know what i mean.

after watching us, j mentioned that perhaps anonymous and i should get our own show on ESPN. i could just see it now. my sister casts a good 80 yards out... reels in maybe 20 yards or so and then yanks the lure back into the boat (because she doesn't like it when they hit close to the boat.) and then there's me. who caught two large toothy creatures on top water (which is fishing lingo for when a fish jumps at your lure as you drag it across the surface to resemble a frog or bug) and a) shrieked like a girl and b) thought that the fish snapped its teeth at my sister when i heard metal snap.

and i also got bit by a largemouth bass (they don't bite, and don't have teeth really) when i lipped it and didn't paralyze it -- it closed its large mouth (because it was.. you know... a largemouth ba- oh you get it) on my finger. i may have panicked a little. and i may have dropped the fish. in the boat. you know. stuff like that.

but really, the week was great. and e was adorable what with his fantastic following of protocol during our 6 a.m. carbon monoxide alarm, and his ability to fish just like mommy. (and no long cries when we throw the fish over board, so that's good.)

and we DID canoe. and we did NOT tip.

so those are the highlights and *that* is what i've been up to.

i think there may have been some stories that i missed, but hopefully, my sister will pipe up with some comments...

Monday, June 02, 2008

Someone shoot that rooster

Well, I did it. I quit my weekend job. It was getting to be too much, what with my fancy weekday job rubbing elbows with the guv-nah and assorted other officials. Plus, as the Pretend Husband pointed out, it's kind of ridiculous to continue to pay that company for the privilege of driving up there and working for them (I still contend I came out ahead... a little... but he does have a point).

So, I gave four weekends notice and come July, I will have two whole days off a week. Yee-haw! I'm not sure I'm going to know what to do with myself since it's been over a year since I've had a whole weekend off (well, except for assorted ones like, oh, my honeymoon... but you know what I mean). It's nice to be able to plan trips away, projects around the house (and no, we haven't sold our house yet... and yes, I'm a little sensitive that the house down the street that needs tons more work than ours sold first) and other such activities. I'm not sure I'm going to know what to do with so much time.

And there will be, of course, some major sleeping in on that first Saturday that I don't have to get up at 4 a.m. on. Yup, 4 a.m. It's amazing how much I've aged in a year because it didn't hurt this bad when I started this job (and until a few months ago, it included getting up at 5 a.m. on Sunday too!) The last couple Saturdays have been a little rough on the ol' body.

I imagine this is going to be one of those jobs that years from now, when I'm on the radio full-time, I can talk about as my initiation. "I got up at 4 a.m.-- no, 2 a.m.-- and walked 15-- no, 25 miles-- in the snow to work, where I cranked the handle to get the station on the air and walked to all the police departments in a 10-mile radius to collect the news and stayed on the air for 14 hours to make sure people knew what was going on." Or something like that.