Things the world needs: Exit Interview for Ex's

So I had this conversation with a very good friend of mine that I would link to if she wrote a blog but she doesn't so that just makes this an awkward long sentence.

She has had some bad luck with dating recently, and was telling me about it. Wisely, she was not seeking my advice because I don't really claim to be any sort of an expert on that, with notable exceptions.

For the most part, it's KAT that is the expert on the dating thing. Though since we're both out of practice, I thought I'd try to approach this latest dating dilemma my friend is going through with an approach I'm most familiar with: a business approach.

We've decided really, all parties would be best served by an exit interview after the last date. The problem with administering this kind of thing is that you sometimes don't KNOW when the last date is. Problematic *and* potentially embarrassing.

This is why I propose an online Exit Survey that can be administered to the man/woman who so recently decided to "go in a different direction" - mainly, away from you. (I'm totally going to create this - don't go stealing my idea, Interweb. I'll kick your pixels from here to Al Gore's house.)

So here's my sample survey, but I'd love to get some more input from the Interweb. Please add your questions in the comments.

1. Describe the main reason we won't be romantically linked going forward:

a) I'm just not attracted to you
b) I'm attracted to you, but I find myself drawn to everyone else *more* than you.
c) I have recently decided to pursue other options (the waitress from last night's date, your best friend, your sister, your ex-boyfriend, etc)
d) You are way too serious for my liking.
e) You're the bees knees, honey, but I have been kidnapped by aliens.
f) You scare me a little.

2. How would you describe my abilities as a love interest:

a) I've made out with my hand and evoked more enthusiasm.
b) You were okay, but frankly, I'm more into me. Tell me more about my eyes.
c) You were brilliant, but alas, your brilliance is intimidating.
d) You need to step it back, honey. There's no need to pack me my lunch and send me off to work with a silkscreened lunch bag says says "SJ loves J 4Ever" - on our second date.
e) You would be awesome if you showed one iota of interest in just something I did or said.
f) You were an awesome love interest. But I found a better one.

3. Does your not seeing me anymore have anything to do with (choose one):

a) me not sleeping with you?
b) me sleeping with you?
c) that time I threw up on you?
d) that time I dropped my beer all over you?
e) the fact that all of my friends (appear to) hate you?
f) that time I made you miss the Red Sox game to go to my cousin's wedding?

4. What was your favorite quality of mine?

a) I'm hilarious.
b) I'm incredibly intelligent.
c) I'm bee-you-tea-full.
d) I have tons of super awesome friends.
e) I have a really nice car/house/apartment.
f) I am incredibly fun to be around.

5. What was one thing I need to work on?

a) I need to have a better sense of humor.
b) I need to read more.
c) I need to work on my fashion sense/overall look.
d) I need to find new/more friends.
e) I am too involved with work/charities/organizing other people's lives.
f) I need to figure out how to better relate to humanity.


So. There you are. My first draft. What do we think?