Polishing our parenting skills

She welcomed us into her world with vomit. She tested us with puke.

And now our adorable bundle of joy is preparing us for parenthood. (Before I go any further... and anger any parents... I will readily admit that owning a dog is much, much harder than owning a kid. I mean, easier! It's much easier than owning a kid, although it sometimes feels harder. But I understand that you can't pen a kid into the kitchen while you go to work, so that probably makes it tough.)

Anyway, I arrived home after work yesterday to find our 15-pound Peekapoo had thrown up on the kitchen floor six times (yay for easy-to-wipe vinyl floors, that's all I have to say). Then she proceeded to puke seven more times until there was nothing to come up but blood.

A harried trip to the vet later, we found out she had most likely eaten part of a chicken bone, which was not blocking anything, but had upset her stomach. The advice from the vet was some medicine to calm her stomach, some under-the-skin fluids and plenty of rest. My favorite part (and the only funny part of the entire day) was the fluids they injected under her skin, which gave her a temporary hump on her back until they were absorbed.

The Pretend Husband's reaction was, "You broke my dog!" and we laughed afterward about how she wasn't all that sick when we brought her into the vet's office, but was looking like the Hunchback of Notre Dame when we brought her out.

All in all, it seems like the having to drop everything, rushing to the doctor while fearful of what they would find and nursing the little one back to health (Molly had chicken and rice for lunch while all I had was pasta!) was good practice for someday becoming parents. Although I'm assuming parenting lacks the last part of the night... the one where Molly woke up at 2 a.m. and crawled onto the PH's chest before her grand finale vomit. But I could be wrong about that.

I accept the challenge!

The quote o' the week from the Pretend Husband:
"I'm going to post on that [Funny Gals] one of these days just to show you how easy that writing thing is."

Yeah, as anyone who has ever written a blog... or anyone who has tried to come up with something witty to put in the comments... or anyone who has never commented because they don't think they're funny enough... will tell you, it's NOT that easy! I'm thinking the PH and SJ's husband, J, may have to do a guest post or two... and we'll let the audience choose the winner. What do you think?

How I know I'm old...

The Pretend Husband and I (along with SJ and Jason and all of our crazy jokes) went out of state this weekend and bought me a gorgeous, sparkly wedding band with more diamonds than I've ever owned.

And yet...

I'm slightly more excited about the pantry the PH constructed and painted for me.

My, how things change when you hit 30!

Just like Thelma & Louise... if they had brought their husbands with them

We spent more than an hour in the car this weekend, driving to another state, to buy our wedding bands. I know, I know. Our state, though small, probably has plenty of places to get some of those round pieces of wedding bondage (um, that doesn’t sound right…) but we heard about this awesome jewelry store! With great prices! Holding a sale this weekend and this weekend only!
That, coupled with the opportunity to spend hours locked in a car with SJ and her husband J, and the chance to have lunch with college pal MP and her husband, MP (how confusing is that?), made for one great adventure.
We got my wedding band, it’s beautiful, it’s sparkly and it was an amazing deal. That’s enough about that because, while it was very exciting, it wasn’t half as fun as the car ride. Four adults, one confined space and about 12,000 jokes. We were all rolling on the floor with laughter (except for me, who kept her hands firmly at 10 and 2 while trying not to drive off the road or snort too loudly). For example, there was that one about… um, yeah, that was actually pretty racist and I’m kind of ashamed for laughing, so I won’t be sharing that one. OK, how about the one I said about Setback… well, that’s actually more of an inside joke so you probably wouldn’t find that one funny either.
We determined that we’re all pretty funny people, but, between the four of us, are about as quick-witted as one reasonably talented comedian. So we could put on a pretty good act, but it would take all four of us trading places on stage and timing it so the person with the best line was at the microphone when they thought of it. And the audience would have to spend a lot of time with us to know the background for all our inside jokes (or, at least, not be racially-sensitive).
Come to think of it, maybe we’d better just stick to yukking it up on our road trips.

sj's pictorial diary of the day the power went out at work

see, molly? this was really all for you.