Because marriage is not all love and roses (sometimes it entails discussions of bathroom functions...)

My brother warned the Pretend Husband about the meat sauce. He told him that it was delicious, but he would be burping and-- ahem-- farting for quite a while after eating it. Which, as I can attest after getting into bed with the PH last night-- is entirely true.

Kat's lil bro text messaged the PH this morning to see if they were both experiencing the same symptoms and the answer was "yes." Which didn't stop the PH from having more of the meat sauce for lunch today. Which then led to the PH sending me this email:

Don't yell at me... By the time you see me tonight, there will be buffalo wings and meat sauce brewing. So, if it is an unpleasant evening, it is not my fault.

It so happens that someone gave me a box of chocolates today. And the chocolates were sugar-free (which I've heard can mess with one's gastrointestinal system) AND they seemed a bit old. So I sent an email back to the PH warning him my stomach might not be right either. (We are so romantic, aren't we?)

His response was: That's ok. I will shoot an email to the dogs and give them the heads up. It is only fair.

hot in the city

last night, in honor of a good friend and office-mate (although, sadly, no longer a direct office mate, as she now works in our manhattan office), my work-bff jill and i took to the big apple to meet bb.

it's a very rare occasion that i hit new york. in fact, i prefer to do it with KAT, an entire cheesecake and some serious martinis at this place we found on 16th street that has a specialty of "mac and cheese." (which reminds me, KAT, we need to do that again, but this time, hit Crumbs for giant cupcakes with names like "the devil dog", etc.)

however, from time to time, me and a couple of the girls from work (both used to live in the city on the upper east side) like to do it up. last night was one of those nights.

for october 18th, it was surprisingly warm, so my knee high boots and hot pink trench were not the best choice i could have made (but it looked so cool!), particularly when i was sandwiched in the 6th train headed towards 23rd street and park. it was hot, hot, hot, and that's something i just don't feel when i'm all sweaty and stuff.

but it was worth the comedy that my outfit caused - because as i was leaving work yesterday to catch the train in darien, one of the execs told me "wow- pink on black - mee-ow." seriously? who "me-ows?" at all? or in public? in an *office?!* all i can say, is thank GOD we weren't in the city when he said it, else i end up on Overheard in NY.

so i'm in the office exceptionally early this morning, since i stayed with jill in her insanely beautiful colonial on a cul de sac in new canaan (one of the top 10 most wealthy communities in the us, which makes me want to go volunteer in a soup kitchen now, as i feel republican by association).

i'm also starting to rethink that second bottle of white wine.

but - in the end, so, so worth it.

Random facts you could have lived without

Let’s see, I’ve told you about my grooming habits, how I got engaged,how it feels to have puke down the inside of my shirt… really, is there anything left to share?

Oh, but there is! And since I’m bored at work and have some random semi-posts rattling around in my head that I can’t seem to make an entire post out of, I’ve picked rightthissecond as the perfect time to share.

– I appreciated Molly’s suggestion to try dying my hair now that I’m noticing tons of grey in it. Actually, it made me giggle because I’ve actually been dying my hair since I was in the eighth grade. At first, it was because I preferred reddish highlights to my natural blond-ish ones, but now it’s serving an important purpose (making people not mistake me for SJ’s mom when we’re out together!) I really can’t blame anyone but myself for the grey because I’ve just been too lazy to cover it up.

– We visited a house under construction yesterday that belongs to friends of ours. It’s a gorgeous, huge home at which I am looking forward to plenty of parties. But I’m filing this under the “I’m officially old” category because my first thought when we walked in was, “Boy, am I glad I don’t have to clean this!”

– The Pretend Husband and I have an ongoing argument about farting in bed (I warned you about not needing to know this stuff!) He refuses to stop, so I’ve taken to launching my own attack, so to speak. But it seems kind of hypocritical so, when he gets angry, I’ve tried to argue that guys’ farts are terrible, but girls’ farts are actually unicorn kisses. This morning, I sang a whole song about unicorn kisses, but I don’t think he bought it.

– In my quest to lower my cholesterol and lose weight for the wedding, I’ve been eating tons of cereal, fruits and vegetables– foods that are all very high in fiber. Let’s just say there have been a lot of unicorns flying around blowing kisses in our house lately.

– I have so far failed in my quest to get the digits of a woman we met in the dog park (with the PH egging me on, no less). But I’m working on it. Before you get too enthralled with this, it’s because our dogs get along great. And she seems like a nice person. And perhaps she’s into threesomes too (just kidding about that one!) Anyway, it’s because our dogs get along and it would be nice to be able to call her up and see when she’ll be at the dog park because she’s also fun to talk to.

And I’m officially getting married in less than four months so why am I spending time sharing way too much information with strangers when I could be assembling invitations? Back to work, KAT!