The Pretend Husband went missing this weekend. But I wasn’t even upset about it because whoever took him replaced him with a similar looking model with the biggest romantic streak you’ve ever seen.
The PH surprised me with a trip to Boston this weekend for our second wedding anniversary. We ate good food, wandered around to a million different places, hunted out the best ice cream in the city, tried to buy cannoli in the North End (the PH: “what business doesn’t take credit cards these days?!?”), napped more than our fair share and just enjoyed the crap out of the chance to spend time alone with each other with nothing else tugging at our attention.
We decided we will never own a Sleep Number Bed after a too-soft bed the first night resulted in lower back spasms for me and a too-hard bed the second night was just uncomfortable for us both (but still better than back spasms).
He decided we will never live in Boston, even after we retire and have a couple million dollars laying around just begging to be invested into a brownstone on Beacon Hill. I’m still not entirely convinced it’s not a sound plan, but we have some time to argue about it.
And I think we’re both in agreement that I’m the better driver. Oh wait, no. The PH doesn’t necessarily think that, but agrees there’s a lot less arguing when I’m behind the wheel (I still say I wouldn’t be such a bad passenger if he wasn’t so bad about not braking until we’re practically in the trunk of the vehicle in front of us. I’m just saying.)
And I knew the honeymoon was over when, a few hours after arriving home, the PH insulted not just me, but SJ too! As we were telling friends about all our Setback playing adventures, I told them the PH and j always try to anticipate how we’re going to play our hands and act accordingly. But it often backfires because SJ and I aren’t exactly known for our logic when it comes to cards (We say, “You know what to do” a lot, but I don’t think either one of us takes that seriously…)
“Yeah,” the PH said. “You can’t outplay crazy.”
Oh, good. It appears my husband has returned.