Wednesday, May 30, 2007

No, I did not catch the clap.

Very funny, though.

To sum up, because I'm sure you're dying to know... here is the summation of the things i caught:

sunfish: 4

trout: 0 (the only trout available to be caught were lake trout, and they live quite deep...)

large mouth bass: 2 that counted. several more that were so tiny that when my sister tried to lip them to remove the hook, her thumb could barely fit into its mouth.

small mouth bass: several, but 3 nice ones. including one caught while sitting indian style on the back of my sister's boat. which, if you've ever tried hooking and fighting a nice bass while seated in a fashion where you could feasibly fall in after the fish, you know what a challenge this is.

rock bass: a half dozen or so. spiny little creatures.

toothy creatures: too many! "Dad, can you take this off the hook?" several northern pike and several more pickerel. and sightings of alligator gar and bowfin. i should add that these sightings were promptly followed by anonymous and i promptly removing our lures from the water.

perch: funny story about the perch. i actually took off several, but when i think about the fish sperm on my hands after taking one off, it's possible i had millions of potential perch in/on my hands. (for the record, this was not my fish, it was anonymous' fish that i was removing when it... unloaded.) i haven't been tested, but one assumes that it was not carrying the clap or any other STD that a human could possibly get by um.. handling perch spunk.

clams: 7. i have no idea how i managed to catch so many. they do not sit on the ground. they float. so imagine my surprise when i caught one after another using my various lures. it's a talent, passed on to me by my mother.

sunburn: absolutely! across my nose and face, and a bit on my forearms. most of this has faded, but i am peeling about the nose and cheek.

the desire to have children: this waned in and out. holding baby e when he was asleep on the boat: yes. watching the babies run all over while their parents tried to keep up: no. watching them be fascinated by things like their belly buttons, elbows and a deflated balloon: yes. watching them try to launch themselves downhill: no.

we got back late yesterday and today i returned to work, so naturally, i'm tired and about to head to bed. but fishing, and more importantly, the first all family vacation (mom and dad, sisters with husbands and babies and me and my own husband) was relatively pain free. minus of course, the accidentally hooking suffered by anonymous, the lure to the back of the head j suffered at the hands of my dad, and the lure to the stomach he suffered at the hands of my mom -- but other than that... good times.


KAT said...

Welcome home! I think it would have been funnier for you to catch crabs rather than clams, but we'll take what we can get.

It's been a long, lonely week without you around. Let me know when you are going to fry up your catch(es) and I'll be over-- especially for clam night!

sj said...

alas -- the clams are still alive, and tomorrow, will be headed to connecticut. my dad is putting them in his pond. unless you are a DEP worker for the state of vermont. in which case, we promptly returned them from whence they came.

i missed you! we have so much to talk about! i learned a new way to play scrabble! i've forgotten how to play setback!

what about friday night? or sat. early dinner because you get up at the butt crack of dawn?

Molly said...

Hurrah, I got one of the answers correct! And I am very relieved you did not catch the clap!

Anonymous said...

Funny post SJ!
come on there were more timest that 'E' was cute... what about when he cried when the fish had to go BACK into the water?

I have a picture of that smallie you caught that you can post in the blog... the one you fought Indian style... :-)

I have to admit- that scrabble game we played was pretty fun. I enjoyed it.

I am sad that catching clams is not in my blood- I feel left out.

Craig said...

"Perch Spunk" would be a great name for a band. A (s)punk band, of course.

sj said...

well, craig, seeing as i will probably not be starting a (s)punk band any time soon, it's all yours.

and anonymous, it was a true highlight to hear little e say "fishy! fishy!" every time someone caught them. and the way that j and i were distracting him with one hand and tossing the fish back in the water with the other hand was pretty funny. he's too smart for us, though.

Da Sista said...

Ah... anonymous no more..
I had to choose a name for someone ELSES blog.. YES I READ SOMEONE ELSES.. and he wont allow anonymous bloggers.. jerk... so I had to make a name- I choose this one- do ya think its too obvious?
I should change it huh?

sj said...

no, da sista. yay! you have a new identity!!