Tuesday, March 13, 2007

thou art my friend

kat and i had a funny conversation yesterday about liar mcliarpants (she'll be sharing that story eventually, but we've had some funny stuff lately happening around us, so we'll get to it....), and i've decided to steal her expression for regular use at work... and in life in general, of course.

i have a poser mcposerpants in my office right now. go ahead- use the expression. it'll make you laugh.

so i had another social faux pas. and i feel really bad about it. there was this man. and he was very... um... large. he can fill a doorway, and he's also a little wide. which whatever - i don't care about that kind of thing and it doesn't make him gross to me or in anyway repulsive. he seems like a very nice man. but he was coming towards me. and i was walking towards him. and there was an aisle. not a narrow aisle, but not an aisle where we would both fit comfortably at once. so i immediately stood off to the side, as if he could possibly infer: "whoa there, buddy. i don't want to be anywhere near you - you'll knock me over!"

that was not the thought going through my head, but he kind of gave me a "oh fine, lady. you go first" look. and now i feel ridiculous. and i have this overwhelming need to make friends just so he can understand that i wasn't judging.

i have issues. clearly. but i'm not a judger! sure, i mean, there are some people out there with some serious issues (liar mcliarpants included - SERIOUS issues) and i may have a preconceived notion of her being crazy (mostly she painted that dali painting herself).

but really, i'm an easy going gal and hold very little judging thoughts about people. except stupid people, of course. and celebrities. but other than that, i'm your friend.


KAT said...

Whee! Look at SJ go! Post, SJ, post!

By the way, the Liar McLiarpants thing works with almost anything. Just do the word, then Mc, then pants. Try it... Loser McLoserpants. Funny McFunnypants. Boring McBoringpants. (Mollymoo would be English McEnglishpants, I think). I know... I'm Maturity McMaturitypants!

I don't think moving out of the way of the big guy was judgmental. Everyone knows how easily you could have tripped him, fallen into a cubicle and broken bones in both your bodies... you may have actually saved him a trip to the hospital! Hey, it could have been worse... you could have called him Fatty McFattypants!

Molly said...

Hee hee hee! This post is funny, especially the Fatty McFattypants!! I think that I would have done the same thing for fear that he might have swallowed me whole as I walked by. By the way, does he have moobies? Moobies are also a sign of being overweight, not just working out too much.

I use the Mc expression but without the pants. For example, when Ned was born he was such a gassy little baby, in fact they were so loud it was embarrasing because no one would believe that such a sound came from a tiny thing, but it did, honest! So we called him Farty McFarter. And the "Mc" was born into my language.