I admit that I haven't been very funny this week.
However, my darling husband has been on a roll.
Try to contain yourself from jealousy over the loving relationship that we have. (Am kidding. I'm totally certain he loves me, but he loves mostly to tease me in public to watch my reaction. It's like an Olympic sport for him.)
So I give you:
My favorite of J's top quotes.
1) "Would it kill you to put a little makeup on?"
2) "The Amish called. They want their dress back."
3) "You are one bonnet short of a Mennonite."
4) "There's this new invention called the comb. Hear of it?"
I should mention that all of these were uttered when we were out to dinner the other night, and only mentioned in front of the waiter, who I'm sure was ready to slip me a domestic abuse pamphlet.
5) "Would you like a hamburger with that cheese?"
6) "Dude.... Dude.... Dude.... Dude...Are you sleeping?" (about 2 minutes after we turned the lights off last night. I blame the sugar and comedy central.)
7) "Bailey and I had a conversation and he thinks you should sleep on the couch."
8) "Whatever. Tell your gay boy friend/girl friend/amusement park worker/flight attendant I said hello."
9) "But you have to lose big. Because otherwise the house wins." (When trying to explain Poker at the casino to me. This still seems backwards.)
10) Him: "Honey.... honey... honey.... honey.... honey.... honey..."
Him: "What, I was going to tell you I love you. You don't have to be all mean about it."
I know. True love is painful to witness.
So many books...
2 years ago