Monday, July 10, 2006

How I Know I’m Not Ready to Be 30:

* At a family Fourth of July picnic, I couldn’t resist the temptation to get on the trampoline with the kids. I jumped so hard, I made one little boy bounce around and cry… twice! I asked him if he wanted us to stop jumping so he could get off and he cried, “No, I want you to go!” Tough luck, kiddo! I stayed.
* At a recent wedding (don't worry, MM, it wasn't yours!), I had enough Cosmopolitans during the cocktail hour to last me most of the night. That didn’t stop me, though, and I tried to order a Cabernet Sauvignon by asking for “a Cabernon Savernet” (in a French accent, of course!) Why the bartender didn’t cut me off is beyond me.
* I ended the night of the same wedding by vomiting. I’ve only thrown up three times in my life from drinking, but they all seem to have marked major events– the night after I graduated from college, following a wake for a coworker and now, a wedding. Having a christening or a bar mitzvah? Invite me– I promise an entertaining time for everyone!


sj said...

I'm very proud of the fact that i was with you for two out of three of those times.

But for the record, I am not the one that makes you drink.

And yes, folks. The cabernon was for me.

Molly said...

Oh how I wish I was getting ready to be 30 again, you are too lucky! I only have 3 years and I am hitting 40 and not looking forward to this at all. My ideal age was 32, wish I could be that forever!

Ronnie Francis said...

Sounds like 1/3 life crisis to me!