Thursday, May 28, 2009

FunnyGal KAT: Turning to the Internet for marital advice since 2007

Sorry about that whole falling-off-the-face-of-the-earth thing lately. Work kicked my butt (I left the office around noon today because I was already well over 40 hours for this week). But now I'm back.

However, the "funny" seems to have been left back on the deck of my family's cottage, where we hung out with SJ and J and some other fun people for Memorial Day. What did we do? Well, nothing, and that's just the way I like it...

So, since I have no funny, let's play a little game called, "Is My Marriage Normal?" First the background and then I will ask the question and open the floor to your own stories, comments about how you can't believe I would even consider this, amusing anecdotes I can use as my own until something funny happens to me, etc.

I will try to make the background as succinct as possible. Basically, the Pretend Husband handles our finances and I stay in the dark about our fiscal health (numbers were never my thing). Anyway, the PH and I have very different spending habits and, in an effort to curb his a bit and take away my (self-imposed) guilt about buying new shoes or something like that, I have suggested we each open a checking account linked to our joint account. Each week, I propose we put an "allowance" into each account that we could use for expenses like going out to lunch, new shoes, a round of golf, new shoes, my soccer registration, a night out with the guys or new shoes. Expenses like gas and groceries would still be paid out of our main account.

So, what do you think? Is it weird to be an adult and have an allowance? I tend to like the idea (except for it being called an allowance...) because I think it will cut down on what the PH spends and will give me "mad money" so I won't have to ask the PH if it's OK to spend money (only because I don't want to mess up his budgeting by taking money out of our joint account, not because I need permission-- that would be weird). OK, enough of me trying to justify this. Do you do it? Do you have any better ideas? What do you think? Is My Marriage Normal?


Sam_I_am said...

I think that is an excellent idea. Fiance and I have talked about that, too. Except we would just take a cash allowance out. This all came from us nearly ending up in financial ruins until I stopped my "retail therapy sessions." lol.

Soda and Candy said...

It's all good if you can afford the fees on two more accounts. I'm staying in Allowanceville.

Srg said...

I think it might work as long as you both take responsibility for your own accounts. I do all the bills and financial stuff in our house, so knowing hubby if we ever decided to do something like that, it would mean I'd have 2 more accounts to manage. And right now I think the fewer things for me to keep track of, the better.

FunnyGal KAT said...

The PH wants me to add that it was his idea. (Well, sort of. He wanted us to keep our separate accounts when we got married and pay into a joint account for household expenses. This is kind of the opposite.)

Sam_I_Am: Thanks for the support! And I would know nothing about "retail therapy." Nothing at all...

Soda and Candy: I hadn't thought about fees. But I think our current accounts are fee-free. I wouldn't add more accounts unless they are too.

Srg: We would each have an ATM card for our own account and be responsible for knowing what was in there. I'm trying to make this as easy as possible! I would do what my parents did where my mom took my dad's paycheck and doled out a cash allowance to him each week, but the PH and I deal so infrequently in cash, it seems like it would be more complicated than necessary.

Thanks for the feedback married (and soon-to-be-married) ladies!

kk said...

totally normal, and totally understandable with everything that's been going on financially.

i have my own checking account, as well as our joint account. i'm also in charge of the money and paying the bills. but i just wasn't ready to give up my very own checking account, from which i could draw money to buy birthday presents for Mr. KK, or shoes for myself (I'm with ya on the shoes!). I've had my own checking account since i was 18...just wasn't ready yet to give that up.

and the allowance thing is good. it will probably also give you a peek into what you buy that you don't need to (ie, Starbucks or whatever), as well as see how to get more money for shoes. :)

sj said...

we have an odd set up.

we have three accounts: one is his, one is mine and one is ours, but it's only my money that goes into "ours." but that's the one we pay the household expenses with. j pays for all of our entertainment expenses and vacation stuff, etc. out of his accounts.

yeah, it's not the best system. but i get an allowance each week that i usually put in my own checking account. and i don't have any guilt issues spending my allowance. allowances are awesome.

and as you know, i love me some new shoes.