Friday, August 22, 2008

If I make you laugh, will you give me some advice?

OK, I am seeking some advice on something, but I'm not just going to ask you to give me something without giving something in return. So, first, a funny story... and then I'm going to need you to put out. Uh, information, that is (get your mind out of the gutter! Did you really think I'd proposition you on my blog?!? That's weird! I would call you and ask you over the phone, of course...)

Anyway, first the funny story. The building I work in (on the fourth floor) is connected by a tunnel in the basement to a second building. Well, I watched an event that was happening on the second floor of the other building on TV and then realized I needed to get the names of these two old ladies who had testified about something. So, wearing heels and a dress, I ran to the elevator, took it to the basement, ran through the tunnel, caught an elevator to the second floor... and found I had missed both ladies.

Figuring they couldn't have gotten far (one is 91 and uses a cane, for goodness sakes!), I ran around the second floor then climbed up to the third floor to see if they had exited there. A security guard said he hadn't seen them so we stood at the railing watching the floors below. Suddenly, we spotted them on the first floor, so (still in heels), I took off running for an elevator and took it to the first floor. At first, I couldn't find them, but ran into the cafeteria and caught them as they got their lunch.

Out of breath and with very sore feet, I then went back to the third floor because I figured the security guard would wonder how this little drama turned out. And, for the record, even he commented on how fast those two moved for being little old ladies!

And now, your turn... I have A TON of cleaning ahead of me at the house we're moving into. Dust and dirt and black dust from many years of using a coal stove kind of cleaning. And, if you ask KAT's lil sis, she will gladly tell you that I am more than little challenged in the cleaning department (although, I have gotten better over the weeks of having to clean almost every day for open houses and showings). Anyway, any recommendations you have for awesome cleaning products (such as ones that work instantly without me having to scrub or actually do any work...) are much appreciated. I especially need something that will clean up the mineral deposits (I think? It's a colorful stain in the shower so perhaps it's mineral deposits?) in the bathroom. Offering to fly in and help me clean will also score you a lot of points (Molly, I know you're planning on going to England for Christmas, but this would be a lot cheaper and almost as much fun, wouldn't you say?!?)

11 comments:

Srg said...

I say hire someone to do all that cleaning and rest your poor sore feet after doing all that running around in heels!!

Seriously though, we used to have a lot of copper stains before we got a water neutralization system installed and the only thing that got rid of it was Comet, but you really had to scrub to get it off. As for black dust from a coal stove, depending on where the dust is - like a ceiling or a wall - could you just paint over it?

FunnyGal KAT said...

Thanks for the tips SRG. I have suggested hiring some maids to come in, but I don't think the PH went for it. I will try Comet (even if it does mean having to scrub hard!)

I guess we're going to have to use some awful-smelling oil-based primer over the coal dust because, otherwise, it will show right through regular paint. The stuff is rumored to make contractors throw up after they apply it all day, so I definitely think we'll be hiring someone for that job!

Molly said...

I never thought I would say this but I think I would rather go and see my mother! But thanks for the offer!!

I would go with a maid too, and when I left my old house I got someone to do a deep clean for $60 and it was awesome. However, I think you may need some steam for your project and I suggest you invest in one of those little gadgets that blows hot steam out and then it is easier to clean and supposedly more sanitary. I say supposedly because I have never used one and have only watched the infomercials, but they look good! Let me know if it works out, I might buy one myself to get Ned clean.

And I would put out for you any time, you wouldn't even need to call!

sj said...

dude. i can't believe that you've posted about CLEANING products on our blog.

if i wasn't feeling old previously, i am now.

especially for saying that "CLR" is fantastic for cleaning mineral deposits. we have a well (don't even get me started about that because, of course, i live across from a giant water tower), so we get those rust stains out by some squirts of CLR.

Srg said...

Instead of doing an oil based primer (and yes that crap stinks to high-heaven because we used something similar on our ceilings since they were never sealed properly - but that's a whole other story) you could pick a color that you like and get the primer tinted to match. I've been using tinted primers in every room that I've painted in the house and after 2 coats of primer and 2 coats of paint I have yet to see anything through all that. And we've had some walls with black marks/streaks on them that are now all nice and beige.

hautepocket said...

Yea, uh....while you DID make me laugh, I unfortunately can not help you. I don't really *do* cleaning. Well, I do, but only very basic stuff like vacuuming and wiping down the counters..I would recommend hiring someone to do it for you. Lol.

Dawn said...

That is a great story!! I am challenged in the cleaning department too, so I really don't know the answer. And now I feel cheap for reading the story and then not giving back! Have a great weekend!

KAT's little sis said...

KAT,
I don't know much about the shower stains and coal stove soot, but let me suggest Clorox toilet bowl cleaner with bleach for the nasty toilets in that place. Squirt it in the bowl and leave it for a few hours and your bowl will be as white as can be.

You know I love to clean. I'd be up there to help you out if I weren't about to pop this kid out!

Sissy said...

Sadly I have no cleaning advice. I'm what I like to refer to as Housework Challenged. But your story made me laugh. Made me yearn for the days when I used to chase parolees who ran from revocation hearings in 4 inch heels. No, I don't know exactly what I was thinking wearing 4 inch heels as a parole officer. Aaahhh, another lifetime...

Stephanie said...

Merry Maid? Kitchen Kleaner? Tiffany Toilet? If I were you, I would hire a professional. And then drink a glass of wine or four.

Scott said...

Yea, I'm going with the maid. I clean as little as possible and really have no urge to do so until my children are big enough to pick up after themselves. :-/

I do have to say that when I do decide to wipe things down a bit I like Clorox bleach scrub. It gets stuff up pretty easily.