Friday, February 24, 2006

A conversation with a dog.

This is a Friday ritual between me and Bailey.

6:55.
Bailey: Whimper, whimper.

Me: Bales! Mommy wants to sleep until 7:30. Will you let mommy sleep until 7:30 please? It's Friday and you know mommy wants to get sleep on Fridays.

Bailey: Whimper. *smash. (He's swatted at his food bowl for the extra metallic clang to emphasize his point: Let me out of the crate, now, or you won't sleep tonight either.)

6:58
Bailey: Whimper!

Me: FINE. I'll be down in five minutes. (I rearrange the covers over my ears.) You know, Bales, it's not like you didn't just leave the bed. You've been down there for a half hour. Chill out

Bailey: Whimper, yawn, stretch.

7:01
Bailey: Whimper, whimper.

Me: I'm ignoring you until it's at least 7:15.

Bailey: Whimper. BARK!!!!

Me: FINE! (I trudge downstairs. Open his crate door, whereupon he jumps on me and shoves his tongue up my nose.)

Bailey: YAWWN. (He settles down on the couch.)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I look at it this way. Bailey is clearly training you for what life will be like when you have a child, however he does need to whine louder and bark more.....

stac said...

I was just about to say replace the wimpers with "Maaa!!" and the final bark with a "WAAAAAAA!!" and there's a good view of life with youngin's!

Until they learn to get out of bed and climb down the stairs themselves that is...